Next Time

Do you want this thing?
I made it thinking of you
I made it because I know you don’t like yourself much
or how you look
and how you think
and you’re convinced nothing you’ve done is right
and I don’t agree with you all the time
or think you’re perfect
but I think you are wonderful
and you’re brilliant
and you’re bright
like a towering oak with spreading green arms
sunlight blasting through
casting a shadow and scattering images
and it was just a game for you
or it was a silly joke at first
but you made something in my mind
and I made this thinking of you
and I made it hoping that other people
the people you’re afraid to talk to
the people you’ve been hurt to know
can look at this
and wonder at what great things
what cool things
what fun, fair, and passionate things
you made grow in my mind.

I guess it doesn’t interest you
Oh well.
Next time.

Do you want this thing?
I made it for the world
And if you look in it you’ll see your fingerprint
and there’s him
and her
and them
and us
and I thought you might be happy, but I think
that you matter to me doesn’t matter to you
because my saying it doesn’t make it feel true
and I’m just some words on a screen

I guess it isn’t that polished
And oh wow I really messed up there, right
I’ll try harder
Next time

Do you want this thing?
I made it hidden away
It’s a secret prize,
Just for your eyes

I’ll try harder
Next time.

Do you want this thing?
I’m making it just for me.
I’m dying daily and my ego’s failing
and I have nothing worthwhile to leave
You’ve not even looked?
Well, that’s okay too
But I’m glad that you’re enjoying
And no, you’re not annoying
When we’re talking about you
Creation is what we do

I’ll try harder
Next time.

Because that’s what I will keep doing
And have to keep doing
Because it’s always about
Whatever it is I make
Next Time.


  1. aaaaaaaaa

  2. I have it so easy, being so egotistical I can love what I make even when it’s just not that great.

    I wish I knew what to say.

    1. It isn’t a matter of easy or hard. You throw aside plenty of your work because it doesn’t meet your standards.

      1. And yet I still produce heaps of stuff that I don’t have to regret, because I oly really care whether or not /I/ like it. Yes, I have exacting standards, but it’s easy for me to meet those because I know what I like. It’s not like producing for other people – that’s what’s hard.

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